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MAN WITH THE WORDS OF MY DESTINY

sad 53 Age: 57

I knew what was to become my husband 32 years ago. A fatal attraction, one that will mark the life and suggest that you or him or anything. Deleted and thwarted the past, for him I left the boy with whom I was, without regret. The story is continued for two to three years in a see-saw, him, a few years older than me and problems with panic attacks, was wavering, she would not engage in story, I sought and denied me, said I was a spoiled child, some once accused me of having affairs with others, in my presence was courting other, a couple of times is went with his wife the previous year, among other things a my friend, who also accused of having betrayed thoroughly (which is partly true ).

But it, for me, was the most important of all, at all costs, was the man of destiny , humiliation were rewarded with a sort of fusion of soul and of skin, that I had never tried it, which I had the miraculous.

until I left. I felt terrible, almost a year, sometimes we met, but he had other stories (again, with women who believed infidels).

Then I met another, even as he came out of me stories of abandonment, you are not loved, but we loved and would help us. I got pregnant and got married .

And here the man's life began to research, for the first time in his life saying you love me like nobody ever, only now she realized what she had lost , who was desperate.

And I'm the only chance I had to send him to hell, and even I have argued, happy as ever I told him that I would be there forever, and I began to betray my husband every now and everything I said and I separate then came back swearing that I would not have looked back, but there has never been nothing to do, just made me a whistle ran; the marriage ended after a few years.

I was pregnant, this time the man of destiny.

He was at first frightened, but then threw himself in the adventure. We went in together and got married as soon as I obtained a divorce. E ' born baby and was perhaps the most loving father I've ever known , and also a good companion to grow the other daughter who lived with us .

E 'went on for about twenty years, with many fights, many misunderstandings , different tastes, but a passion unchanged, at least I thought. More we went on, however, and most everything I said and did was the object of denigration , I was a bad mother, I spent too much, had prevented him from cultivate his friendships and sports (and errors, intransigence and assertiveness I've certainly done), and again throwing insinuations, between the serious and the facetious, my betrayal, assigned by my boss (especially) the neighbor had only a joke, a benevolent account up a person. But the truth were things that lasted a few hours, I swear it was not true and ended up in a few hugs. He always hated my work more rewarding than his.

In the first year I made a few attempts because the face and fought her panic attacks, but he never wanted to heal, the end was that no tacit could do if you do not travel by car (no train, no air, nothing ships) and avoiding overpass (so few highways allowed). I decided not to insist on seeing a panic attack once on the highway, he was very ill and I have convinced him to fucking.

About 10 years ago is a great tragedy happened, we scored. Life stopped for so long, but there was another daughter, almost at the threshold of adolescence requiring care and attention, even with the help of psychotherapy are continued.

He drank a little too far and is ingrassato tanto. Anch'io un pò di consolazione serale nell'alcool l'ho cercata.

Poi è andato in pensione, troppo presto, troppo giovane  . Da lì ad un anno circa è cominciata la fine.

Ha cominciato ad essere più ombroso ed irritabile che mai,anche con la figlia,  ha cominciato a rifrequentare con assiduità i suoi vecchi amici di quando era single (accomunati da una fondamentale misoginia), a detestare i nostri amici comuni frequentati per una vita, poi ha cominciato a sviluppare idee paranoiche sui vicini di casa e non c'era verso to convince the other hand, reacted violently to any attempt of proportion.

E 'became increasingly aggressive and unfriendly to me, it was clear that not stand my presence, and finally began to assert polished with envy that he was sure that I had always betrayed by everyone: to work with neighbors, friends (including his own, almost never seen) and who I went to shoot. What had always known but had stifled truth for the sake of peace, for her daughter.

But that's enough, now it was over, he went.

I pianto ed ho pregato , ho scongiurato e minacciato, ho giurato su tutto e su tutti che non era vero niente , che anzi al contrario era sempre stato l'unico

e solo grande amore della mia vita, che non doveva giudicarmi per il passato, che avevo tradito sì altri , ma solo per lui.

Ogni mia negazione provoca(va) solo nuovo disprezzo ( "ma almeno un atto di lealtà, un atto di lealtà, nemmeno di quello sei capace, nemmeno quello mi merito, tanto poco valgo") e scoppi di inaudita violenza , mi ha picchiato più volte ed ha distrutto mobili e stoviglie in un fragore di vetri.

Gli ho scritto lettere, che non ha letto, ho pianto ed ho urlato tutto quello che ero capace, ma sembra(va) come diventato impermeabile a qualsiasi tentativo

di coinvolgimento emotivo.

Infine se ne è andato di casa, pensavo di morirne e c'ho anche provato . Ora è quasi un anno e mezzo che è via. Ha smesso completamente di bere, fa molto sport ed è dimagrito Ci vediamo spesso, è sempre molto disponibile sulle cose

pratiche, ogni tanto andiamo a cena o al mare, d'estate. Se taccio oppure si parla della figlia, va tutto bene, si può fare anche gli amanti ( raramente e per poco), ma se si casca sull'argomento(delirio) finisce in tragedia. Il massimo che ottengo è che mi mi guarda con compassione, dicendomi che devo essere schizofrenica, tanto mi immedesimo nella mia menzogna.

Si è ricostruito una visione della nostra vita insieme dove ogni scelta , dal cane al mobilio, è stata una violenza subita (da lui) dove lui si dipinge accomodante e paziente per amor di quiete( al contrario è sempre stato molto

poco accomodante).

Ho cercato aiuto ovunque, ma la risposta è sempre la stessa can not be cured who does not want to be cured. And, consequently, turn the page, we put a lid on it . I hated the psychiatrists who have had the opportunity to capture it in some way (for example when I was hospitalized after

failed attempt and of course he came to see me) and have not said a word .

But nobody helps me, no one really understands how difficult it is to resign to be crucified by a lie. Resigned to your life, your person despised and hated for something you've never done it too, least for me, at least at this point. I know all of the delusion of jealousy, I know that groped to convince a delusional is impossible, but I continue to hope for a miracle and that my words at some point come into the head and, above all , I can not do without him. Evidently I too have a sick addiction, or are too sad to accept even this blow, after all, after all the choices and mistakes made after what I had already crashed.

I told this story, or because I needed it and because it could save perhaps someone, the clues were all there, at the very beginning. There waterfalls.

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MEN I DO NOT HAVE EVER SAID "I LOVE YOU" MUST BELIEVE IN IF

anna Age: 36

Hello, reading the testimonies related to emotional dependency, I recognized in what is told .. I really had a childhood difficult: my parents were totally absent, we are often too lived in separate houses, my mother at my father's perpetual pursuit, which has betrayed, humiliated, beaten, exploited from the point of view.

Despite this, has always forgiven, even agreeing to go away from me to keep up with her tantrums and constant demands. From this man, who cost me a huge effort to call "father", I also suffered harassment and attempts of violence from 8 to 14 years, from which I was always alone to defend myself. I grew up with his grandparents, but died very young , leaving me all alone at 18. I've always been very independent

, both for character, which by necessity, this led me to work time, always having great satisfaction (not from the point of view cheap!) in professionale.Ho also several good friends and many interests, and this makes my life quite pleasant. From the point of view affective, however, my situation has always been a penalty, from an early age I always had men that I have never said I love you, always prefixed their interests to me, not They never tried to share anything with me ..

The last story began almost 10 years ago, after a few months I discovered she is pregnant, for me the best thing of my entire life.

I knew he did not feel ready, so I told him to choose: could decide not to recognize the small, or to recognize it, but without obligation to stay with me, still would have seen the child when he wanted. He

chose to stay with me, but with an attitude that seems so hostile volermela to pay! In all these years, very little tenderness, so neglect, humiliation, small, no sex. It 'a good father, even if little present, but with me it's disastrous. I tried to share my interests with him, but to no avail .. I can not share his interest, because it has none, not even friends .. Despite ciò, non passa per niente tempo con me, solo ogni tanto tenta un approccio sessuale, ma, non vedendosi mai, non essendoci nessuno scambio affettivo, non è così automatico..

In più, delega tutto a me, dalla gestione della casa, a tutto ciò che riguarda la figlia, e tende a sminuire quello che faccio: il mio lavoro non è poi così stancante/importante, la casa potrebbe essere tenuta meglio, dovrei tenere di più alla sua famiglia, e tante altre piccole cose.. Non lo amo più, sento di meritarmi di più, vorrei stare sola, a meno di incontrare una persona che volesse veramente me e che sapesse amarmi.

Eppure non riesco a lasciarlo.. forse, non avendo altri familiari, nè fratelli, nè sorelle, o zii, cugini, ho troppa paura della solitudine.. o forse non mi stimo abbastanza.. A volte mi dico che ci sono uomini peggiori e situazioni peggiori: in fin dei conti non mi ha mai maltrattata seriamente o fatto cose particolarmente gravi.. Ma non riesco più ad andare avanti così, sto veramente

male e temo non sia di buon esempio neanche per la bimba, che adesso ha quasi 9 anni e si rende perfettamente conto della situazione.

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I have been married 15 years with a male believed to be so I malato.ma

I like him I had some insecurities and did not believe in me and the result is who have been suffering terrible effects on my children.

This possessive man eventually betrayed me with my job, I was left with debts on the house and did not deal with our children, but has managed to do about them mainly on the female that he did to me and I now understand you have accepted

Today my daughter is content with crumbs of love e incontra e accetta relazioni sbagliate e anche dopo un tumore persiste accontentandosi di uomini che la sfruttano.

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giusy Età: 42

Voglio riuscire a capire come uscire dal senso profondo di angoscia e smarrimento che provo dopo essere stata abbandonata di punto in bianco dalla persona che ho amato con tutta me stessa, storia breve iniziata 3 mesi fa, innamoramento folle da parte di lui e da parte mia, separazione dai coniugi e 1 mese di vita insieme, in una nuova casa, un mese di amore immenso, senza problemi di perfetta sintonia, di sincerita e tutto questo da domenica a lunedi, il cambiamento folle da parte di lui, la paura,non so ma all'improvviso se ne andato, mi ha lasciata da sola ed e' ritornato da sua moglie e dai suoi figli, lasciandomi in dramatic psychological conditions 'cause I never thought the abandonment by those who told me love me to death, illustrates the day before. After 1 week I is back on the phone and by e-mail and tell me that 'sorry, and that without me more lives' but can not go back' cause now promised to remain at home . Meanwhile, on a trip abroad with his wife and when I return phone calls storm 'cause you love me to say please help me to understand follia.Vi ' cause I'm still deeply in love with this man who I destroyed in a few days and from which I am completely dependent, I paura sto dentro ad una sofferenza atroce e non riesco piu' a pensare a niente, sono una persona troppo onesta, gli ho messo la mia vita in mano e lui n on ha avuto esitazioni a distruggermi, dopo avermi fatto abbandonare la mia famiglia con convincimenti stravolgenti, con gesti eclatanti di amore folle, non riesco piu' a capire niente so soltanto che vorrei ritornare a quel mese di vita insieme che e' stato il mio sogno, la mia immensa felicita' ora sono straziata dal dolore e non so da dove poter ricominciare per non provare questo dolore vorrei solo morire per non soffrire piu'. grazie.

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Occhiblu Age: 25

Hi! I just read your testimony, and not deny that I was very impressed ....

Above all, I think I have made it clear that having to ask for help from someone ....

In my person there are many "shadows", someone I know who or what it back, others do not!

I am 25 years old, the Second of two daughters, and in some ways a very marked (despite his young age) in life.

I state that I have always lived inferiority towards My sister, dictated by the differences that my mom has always done (in fact she did not nothing other than me, in fact, our paths have always been very similar ).

But, to tell my mom, already in elementary school, I showed this "jealousy" (actually more than jealousy is a lack of affection that I feel from my mom) ... but I do not I remember!

.... I do not think this is just my imagination, because this preference the my sister feels the same and people close to us ...

add that the marriage mine, although they are still together, has always been very fluctuating: the thing that I remember with regret is the continuous speak ill of my mother against my father, who in turn has always been concerned about the his business and "girlfriends" who attended ...

remember as a child I lived bad moments when you were together, because I knew that at 90% probability would be led to a fight ....

another source of disagreement in my house, the money disappeared from salaries entire house (because of my father), but despite everything, My mom has not ever done

miss anything ....

At 13 years I have lived my first love story, which lasted 3 years and over for obvious reasons (too small to go )....

Soon after I and my family we moved to another city.

The insertion was not easy, it took at least four years before get used to the new place: I was only 17 years, and I was literally "uprooted" from my hometown ....

I state that the first move of all, definitely, my sister and I (respectively 15 and 19 years) we are left alone for another year in our city, before deciding to get my ...

Eight months after the transfer I have a serious traffic accident: there are changed I have changed my parents, but also changed our

report.

I do not know how to define, but I know that episode from my life has changed ...

20 years (about 3 years after the accident, and then transfer), I know a other guy, which I love, and, according to him falls hopelessly in love me.

But our story has a distance where he lived before there was my life, especially he had a past as a playboy ....

Our relationship lasts only six months, but lived in a very intense, .... then its back to the hunter to be alive ...

Leave me by phone, after I had traveled all night for him, the next morning.

I collapsed on the world, it takes me a long time to recover.

Again, as in the story, my sister in some way "involved" and always manages to destroy the good relationship he has with my boyfriend ....

in everything I feel a strong anger against him and against my : they are the cause of my illness, I have them brought to this city, making me lose both I and the second boy they wanted me leaving the boy with whom I had the incident (a story for me never had any value) because "not to my height," and she (my sister ) has always my boyfriends looked bad, with the support of my mother that is and will be his accomplice to life!

After just over a year, I know another guy (through my sister's boyfriend ): we put together our story last three years, although

a story never "developed "....

are not enamored of him, but I want a lot of good because I know he loves me , because I can trust him, because he can give me the certainty that my family does not give me ... . Almost immediately, however, the relationship between my boyfriend and the sister of i (who were best friends), tilt, until it becomes second perfect strangers ...

Last year, after 3 years, he leaves me by phone: tells me that the fight for 3 years with his family who does not want to be with me because I'm the daughter of workers ....

Another disappointment .....

more suffering ...

Another fault that I was given by my parents: this time I said be paying for what, because of my family, I had the boy with whom I had had an accident ....

After a few months I know another guy, also through the my sister's boyfriend (they are still together they ...): I fell in love with him, and, felt that it was not paid despite the love, I keep hear / see / attend it ....

Obviously after a few months the situation has become unbearable for me and for him, says he's not in love with me, but also says that

I leaned a lot of my problems ....

Once again my sister is against me and him, once again the relationship between the boyfriend of my sister and my new love .... it is inclined ....

And I'm more angry with myself and with my family ...

I I commend the students with whom I'm totally, I see in them my still salvation, and this leads to the destruction of my reports, while not wanting ....

I missed a lot of things, but I have told my story in a nutshell ...

From you let me know if you should let me help from some experts, if fact, my behavior is dictated by a malaise that I live in my house ....

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Eva et à : 31

My more than a witness to be a call for help .... because the story below I am going to tell you about transference love between me and my therapist. I started my journey of psychotherapy because I had problems, but as the sessions went on always makes me more aware of being attracted to him. When I told him what was going on he took me as a patient saying that with time I would be able to handle it .... but it was not very and he told me he felt the attraction to me.

We had sex .... and when it has tired me explained that it was only a game and that even if feelings for him I had to make a right!! I beg your help because now I'm still bad for what I have now is I want to sincerely come out soon.

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Haidy Age: 44

am a woman invalid motor age of 15 to 100% following a shooting incident early automobilistico.Dopo I resumed a social life and emotional but not limited to caso.Certo I had love affairs gone bad and other more serene. I state that msono degree in law and are autonomous in the management of my person and casa.Cinque years ago I met a man whom we both love seriously point to build our future together, after two years of engagement we got married only with the religious ritual with trscrizione late effects legal issues for capital.

three years of the union of marriage when I see a change in her all'improviso more detached from me .. I do not understand all the questions and if there another woman with whom he denies a lot of my stress sempre.dopo confesses that he does not + unable to be with me needs the woman's feet, missing the that figure.

for me it was a blow .. he is left to take home and now I'm stayed at my house.

all happened the end of June we are now in October.

ASK AND I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE OVER ITS REPORT with a sort of painstaking work, WITH LIBERTY AND MEETINGS CALLS THAT FRIENDLY? is right or wrong and set him free?

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beautiful Age: 26

Hello, I'm a young girl, pretty and educated, I do not defects, the parents have separated, but get along with each other, since they teenager I have always forged ahead, and since childhood I have always been a risk of anorexia, but not I never really fall deeply into the bad because my mind has always prevented me. I love the history behind some serious ended badly, including a lightning marriage with the man I thought was of my life, but in reality I knew far too little to judge him properly, and from which I got fooled, because he was a traitor serial, squandered the money on vices various (drug-alcohol-valuables) and not respected me in any way. From him I had a child, at some point the my salvation (I do not know if you can call it that) was infatuated of my current partner, this three years ago gave me the strength to leave my husband.

now after leaving it, I began a relationship with my occasional current partner, who became serious about two years, are in fact involved their families and children (he is 14 years older than me and is separated with children).

admit however that my low self-esteem, fear of not having at my side a male figure to help me with my son in a practical sense as well affective and low confidence in the possibility of finding a good man

you love me (I or they all seem too perfect to be with me, or the

bad people ...), I have made too many errors accepting that my companion

made in recent years. Only a few days ago thanks to a friend I realized that maybe my could be an emotional dependency and not true love, but I do not know if give serious consideration to this aspect or, if put a joke. The problem is, though because every time he misses me, after the bitter disappointment, anger that try to open my eyes and dream as a possible life without him, in reality, I never force to leave and as often as I left it in the past (the beginning of the report)

the end, I always forgiven and we put back together.

I thought it was the greatness of our love keep us together despite everything but browsing this site I realized that mine is a slavery is not just love.

This slavery has increased over time since both depend more from him in practical sense, because I had changed his work deals with much more than my child, and since I confessed to her illness, dependence

game (and most likely, I suppose, also by drugs)! Since then only have forgiven many things (theft of various items and money and lies different), but I started to see it through different eyes, and before I could see his lies and

his faults as a sign of his wickedness (For these reasons several times the

avevo lasciato) in seguito ho iniziato a vedere quei fatti come segno della sua debolezza e fragilità. Così alle paure per il mio futuro si sono associate le paure per il suo. Ho cercato di aiutarlo in tutti i modi e sebbene sia migliorato, periodicamente trova il modo per accedere a dei soldi (suoi o prestati) e sperperarli nel gioco o in qualche droga. Oltretutto è una persona dolce, che mi ama (probabilmente dipende anche lui da me) e mi aiuta molto in casa e col bambino e quindi mi è ancora più difficile lasciarlo!

Mi rendo conto però che non posso credere in un futuro con lui, perché with him you can not design anything (I struggle to let him keep enough money to make spending) and then I'm too afraid of the repercussions that its problems could have on my person and especially for my son.

So I'm living hand to mouth and no longer understand myself and my desires. I think clearly the days of having to leave, others feel love him so much and dream that he heals in order to realize our future, others feel intensely afraid to leave him.

My friends say that when I am no longer in love and I can leave I also would like to believe because in other cases I've done it, but he did not feel like me . Sometimes I think I need an excuse, like a betrayal his part or even better on my part. In the past I have sabotaged some reports with betrayal / new love, because they know that I have hurt those who loved me created these guilt feelings, and hopes the new report, which I always had the strength to close the ongoing story, but this time I break this vicious circle and let the person I love without trade ....

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BETWEEN YOU AND ME ... I CHOSE ME

dr.Cavaliere Good evening,

as I mentioned already on the phone these past few 10 months have been for me to "hard working staff."

As my problems were only brought to light but never really settled , it was pretty obvious that sooner or later I would again re- landslide in the same crisis of all time.

And frankly I myself, after some time, I realized that I could see very clear even then my problems, but then at the end I was so "under the thumb" of my insecurities that face change seemed to be much more harmful than "accept" grimly what life gave me and which has not made me happy.

This dictated by the fact that I have always stuck in complex situations, sick and I drew from them a kind of sap vital that make me go on.

And on we went, even amid the tears, in pain, doing much harm to me and sending distress to those around me, although cause and contributing cause of this situation.

And everything is gone, until the end of last year, walking walking, I found on the edge of a ravine, flanked by fellow I love ... and there, between my life and my despair, between the sadness of a way of being and the difficulty of having to make a real difference between him and me ... I chose ME.

And this led me to sit in front of a therapist to 18 h of 24 December, including tears, pain, and so on and so forth (known well the topic).

From that moment I began a journey with great difficulty, still act, which did not make me a martyr, a victim of external events, but rather an idiot only victim of his own stupidity.

It was not easy to start, and I do not speak of the first session, I am talking seat number 5, 6, 10 or 15 ... where it seems that talk talk and nothing works. Then suddenly something changes ....

I often describe myself as a submarine that wanders in the depths of the deep pointing the telescope time to time veso someone or something "to save".

Now I'm here to save. The viewfinder is on me ....

Today's better, much better. Although not fully resolved, even the journey is still long.

But I now I am conscious that my change is for ME. I'm working because I'm good, not for me to accept. If others accept me for what I am better, otherwise you leave lose.

Regardless of where this will, what I aim is to safety, to feel good inside, serene with myself. I no longer the goal of pleasing others ... this is a consequence of my change.

I have a lot more confidence, I like myself more, I dedicate it to me, and I do not affects more than the opinions of others.

Now if I buy a dress, if I go to the beautician, if I change the hair do it for me, not my man.

time ago 'I had the blonde dye because I like the blonde him.

months ago 'by chance one afternoon I went to the hairdresser and I said: "Today I return to myself."

I set my hair light brown and natural so I liked the most. That's fine.

I love to my man, but at least, I want the same to me same. My goal is to volermene more.

I get the idea?

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